Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Not all milestones are hallmark moments...

I've been breathlessly awaiting the first time my son would...

You know those milestones... first smile, first step, first laugh, first word, first "I love you," first mumbled "whatever" Hmm. Well not that last one so much.

My newly minted five year old responded to a perfectly polite request for him to hang his coat up in the closet with a "whatever" mumbled under his breath. It was delivered with perfect sitcom accuracy in insolent tone. Where on earth did he pick that up?

I'll admit. I overreacted. Now it was like I was acting the sitcom moment. I, completely on autopilot, responded with, "What did you just say to me, Michael ______ _______?!?" He instantly knew I was pissed and that he had committed some major transgression. He just couldn't figure out what he had done. He froze in his sulky tracks and looked back over his shoulder at me inquiringly.

I repeated my incredulous "What did you just say to me?" question. He responded with a much more tentative "whatever." I vehemently explained that using that word was unacceptable in our house and that it was extremely rude and I never wanted to hear it again.

He wandered over for a hug and some reassurance and looked up at me and asked, "What does that word mean, Mama?" -- He didn't even know what it meant!!

In retrospect, he was experimenting. He had heard the term used at some point (possibly at preschool?), and made some fairly accurate assumptions, based on context, about when and how to use a new vocabulary word. He just didn't really understand the specifics. He decided to try it out at what seemed to him to be an appropriate moment.

I explained that using the word "whatever" tells the person you're talking to that you don't care about what they are saying and that using that word hurts people's feelings and is extremely rude.

I'm pretty sure he won't use the word again for a while and that he mostly understands why. Still, not a conversation I was expecting to have with my five year old.

2 comments:

  1. Get ready - there's lots more coming! Kids love to try out those words. I realized that was inevitable my kids would hear those words so I devised the strategy of explaining that those were "adult words" and that kids shouldn't say them. I also mentioned that there are "kid words" (poopooface, stinky pants, meanie, etc) that adults are not suppose to use. It worked until they were teens and then they proved to have a bigger vocabulary of "adult words" than I did! But by then they avoiding using them around me at least.

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  2. Hi, there. I am Tom Neil and I wish to describe how life had been for my younger brother living with schizophrenia and how he had been permanently able to overcome this debilitating disease via a naturopathic, herbal method.

    Maicon - my kid brother was twenty years old when he was brought to the emergency room by the campus police of the college from which he had been suspended several months ago. A professor had called and reported that he had walked into his classroom, accused him of taking his tuition money, and refused to leave.

    Although he had much academic success as a teenager, his behavior had become increasingly different during the past year. He quit seeing his friends and no longer seemed to care about his appearance or social pursuits. He came to be wearing the same clothes each day and barely bathed. He lived with several family members but rarely spoke to any of them. When he did talk to them, he said he had found clues that his college was just a front for an organized crime operation. He had been suspended from college because of missing many classes. My sister said that she had often seen him mumbling quietly to himself and at times he seemed to be talking to people who were not there. He would emerge from my room and ask my family to be quiet even when they were not making any noise.

    My father and sister told the staff that Maicon's great-grandmother had had a serious illness and had lived for 30 years in a state hospital, which they believed was a mental hospital. Our mother left the family when Maicon was very young. She has been out of touch with us, and they thought she might have been treated for mental health problems.

    Maicon agreed to sign himself into the psychiatric unit for treatment. The whole family except I had agreed to have Maicon transferred to a mental asylum. I knew inwardly there was still some plausible means by which my kid brother could overcome this condition. I knew botanical means of treatment will be more favorable than any other type of treatment, and as such, I had taken a keen interest in the research of naturopathic alternative measures suitable for the treatment of schizophrenia. I had pleaded for some little patience from the family in the delay of the transfer, I was looking forward to proving a point to the entire family, of a positive botanical remedy for this condition.

    It was during my ceaseless search on the internet I had been fortunate enough to come across Dr. Utu Herbal Cure: an African herbalist and witch doctor whose professional works had majored on the eradication of certain viral conditions, especially schizophrenia, ( improving the memory capacity positively), via a traditional, naturopathic process and distinguished diet plan. It was by the administration of this herbal specialist that my brother had been able to improve his condition for better.

    Before the naturopathic remedy - Maicon's story had reflected a common case, in which a high-functioning young adult goes through a major decline in day-to-day skills. Although family and friends may feel this is a loss of the person they knew, the illness can be treated and a good outcome is possible.

    My brother Maicon is just like many other patients out there suffering from this disease. Although he was able to overcome this condition via a naturopathic herbal remedy administered by this African herbal physician and saved completely thus, rekindling the lost joy which had been experienced by the family members.

    I wish to use this opportunity to reach across to anyone who may happen to be diagnosed with this disastrous condition to spread the hope of an everlasting herbal remedy that is capable of imposing a permanent end to this disease.

    For more information concerning this naturopathic herbal remedy, feel free to contact this African herbal practitioner via email:
    drutuherbalcure@gmail.com

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